Khmer Magazines 2014



What do you call a witch who drives really badly? A road hag.

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What do you get when you put a car and a pet together ? Carpet !

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My sister's a really bad driver. What makes you say that? Every time she goes out in the car, Dad puts a glass panel in the floor so that she can see who she's run over.

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What do you say to a one legged hitch-hiker? Hop in.

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A guy driving a Yugo pulled up to a stoplight next to a Rolls-Royce. He rolled down his window and shouted to the driver of the Rolls. "Hey, buddy, that's a nice car. You got a phone in your Rolls? I've got a phone in my Yugo!" The driver of the Rolls looked over and said snobbishly, "Yes, I have a phone." The driver of the Yugo said, "Cool! Hey, you also got a fridge in there, too? I've got one in the back seat of my Yugo!" The driver of the Rolls, much annoyed, says, "Yes, I have a refrigerator." The driver of the Yugo said, "That's great, man! Hey, you got a TV in there? You know, I got a TV in the back seat of my Yugo!" The driver of the Rolls, quite irritated by now, replied, "Of course, I have a television. A Rolls-Royce is the finest luxury car in the world!" The driver of the Yugo said, "Yes, a very cool car! Hey, you got a bed in there? I got a bed in the back of my Yugo!" The driver of the Rolls, upset that he did not have a bed, sped away and went straight to the dealer, where he promptly ordered a bed to be installed in the back of his Rolls-Royce. The next morning, he returned to pick up his car, and the bed looked superb It came complete with silk sheets and a brass-trimmed headboard. It was clearly a bed fit for a Rolls-Royce. So the driver of the Rolls began searching for the Yugo. He drove around all day and finally found the Yugo late that night. It was parked, with all the windows fogged up from the inside. He got out and knocked on the window of the Yugo. When there wasn't any answer, he continued knocking and knocking until finally, the owner of the Yugo lowered the window, and stuck his soaking wet head out. "I now have a bed in the back of my Rolls-Royce," the driver of the Rolls stated arrogantly. The driver of th e Yugo looked at him narrowly and said, "You got me out of the shower to tell me that?!?!"

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Q: What can you do to help ease a heavy traffic problem? A: Carry loaded weapons.

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a quadruple amputee is waiting at the bus stop.The bus pulls up.Driver says "alright John, how you getting on today?"

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A Lutheran minister is driving down to New York to see the radio show and he's stopped in Connecticut for speeding. The state trooper smells alcohol on his breath and then he sees an empty wine bottle on the floor, and he says, "Sir, have you been drinking?" And the minister says, "Just water." The sheriff says, "Then why do I smell wine?" And the minister looks down at the bottle and says, "Good Lord, He's done it again!"

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Policeman: Didn't you hear me whistle at you? Woman Driver: Sure, but I don't flirt when I drive.

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A man was fed up of having his car broken into and having his radio stolen he decided he would remove it when he parked his car he also left a note saying there is no point in breaking in my car as there is nothing to steal. When he returned to his car it had been broken into again and there was a new note where his had left his, saying just checking.!

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Q: What do you call a laughing motorcycle? A: A Yamahahaha

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Policeman: What do you think you're doing parking your car there? Motorist: I thought it was good place. It says "Safety Zone."

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Policeman: Why have you parked your bus here? Bus Driver: The sign says "Bus Stop."

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The only thing wrong with a perfect drive to work is that you end up at work.

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Brother: How do you top a car ? Sister: Tep on the brake, tupid.

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It had been snowing for hours when an announcement came over the intercom: "Will the students who are parked on University Drive please move their cars so that we may being plowing." Twenty minutes later there was another announcement: "Will the nine hundred students who went to move fourteen cars return to class."

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Policeman: Why are you driving on the sidewalk? Motorist: It's too dangerous on the street.

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Policeman: Did you realize you just missed that bus with your car? Motorist: Did you want me to hit it?

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Why is it not safe to doze on trains? Because they run over sleepers.

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Q: Who has the right of way when four cars approach a four-way stop at the same time? A: The pick up truck with the gun rack and the bumper sticker saying, "Guns don't kill people. I do."

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Q: Do you yield when a blind pedestrian is crossing the road? A: What for? He can't see my license plate.

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Who drives away all his customers ? A taxi driver.

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A man was driving up a steep and narrow mountain road. A woman was driving down the same road. As they passed each other, the woman leaned out the window and yelled, "Pig!" The man immediately leaned out his window and replied, "Moron!" They continue on their way and as the man rounded the next corner, he crashes into a pig in the middle of the road.

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Blake and his parents were drinking at the bar in a train station when they heard a whistle. The three of them rushed out of the bar onto the platform only to discover that they had missed the train. "The next train is in one hour," said the stationmaster. The three went back into the bar. The parents had another drink; Blake had a Pepsi. Again they heard a whistle, rushed out and discovered the train pulling away. "Next one is sixty minutes from now!" said the stationmaster. An hour later, Blake, with his mom and dad, raced out onto the platform, and his parents leaped onto the train as it pulled away. The boy was left standing on the platform and began to laugh uproariously. "Your parents just left you," said the stationmaster. "Why are you laughing?" "They came to see me off!"

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"When you exit the bus, please be sure to lower your head and watch your step." "If you miss your step and hit your head, please lower your voice and watch your language. Thank you."

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