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Dentist jokes

A patient came to
his dentist with problems
with his teeth.

Patient: Doctor, I have yellow teeth, what do I
do?

Dentist: Wear a brown tie!

 

What did Jack Frost say to Frosty the Snowman? Have an ice day!

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A Scotsman is sitting in a bar in Cuba and is minding his business when a man with a large black beard walks in. The man goes to the bar and orders a shot of whisky. The bartender serves him, the man drinks the whisky then starts walking out the door. The bartender says, "Hey aren't you going to pay for that?" The man says, "Excuse me, Castro's Army." The bartender says, "Alright then" and the man leaves. A few minutes later another man with a large black beard walks in. The man goes to the bar and orders a shot of whisky. The bartender serves him, the man drinks the whisky then starts walking out the door. The bartender says, "Hey aren't you going to pay for that?" The man says, "Excuse me, Castro's Army." The bartender says "Alright then" and the man leaves. The Scotsman gets an idea and walks up to the bar and orders a shot of whisky. He drinks the whisky then start s walking out the door. The bartender says, "Hey aren't you going to pay for that?" The Scotsman says, "Excuse me, Castro's Army." The bartender says, "Hey where is your big black beard?" The Scotsman thinks quickly. He lifts his Kilt and says, "Secret Service!"

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Two blind man at a cinema: "Can you see something ?" "No". "Then let's go in front !"

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Q: Why did the mirror have 6 holes in it? A: A blonde tried to shoot herself!

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The world is divided into two groups. There are those who know, and those who don't know. Those who know are no problem. Those who don't know are also in two groups. One is those who don't know and know they don't know. Well, they can learn! But then, there are those who don't know, and don't know they don't know. And they become unit managers!

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What's a moo hoo for the sound you hear when a cow spits? A cud thud!

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Newsflash: Two criminals have escaped from prison today. One is orange and 9ft tall, and the other green and yellow and 2ft Gin tall. The police are searching high and low for them.

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Did you hear about the Jewish doctor who gave a patient six months to live? When the patient couldn't pay, the doctor gave him another six months.

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Knock Knock Who's there ? Chef ! Chef who ? Chef Bridges !

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Where do bees keep their money? In a honey box.

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Q: What's the definition of a nerd? A: Someone who has his or her own alto clarinet.

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Q: Why did Moses wander in the desert for 40 years? A: Even then men wouldn't ask for directions!

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What do you call a snake who works for the governement ? A civil serpent !

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Why do bears have fur coats ? Because they'd look stupid in anoraks !

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Where do you find a down-and-out octopus ? On squid row !

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Sherlock Holmes and Matthew Watson were on a camping and hiking trip. They had gone to bed and were lying there looking up at the sky. Holmes said, "Watson, look up. What do you see? "Well, I see thousands of stars." "And what does that mean to you?" "Well, I guess it means we will have another nice day tomorrow. What does it mean to you, Holmes?" "To me, it means someone has stolen our tent."

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What do mice do when they're at home ? Mousework !

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Why did the old lady cover her mouth with her hands when she sneezed? To catch her false teeth.

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Q: Why are blondes like corn flakes? A: Because they're simple, easy and they taste good.

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What did the hamburger say when it found out that most people liked hamburgers better than frankfurters? 'Hot dog!'

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