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Dentist jokes

Why didn't the dentist ask his secretary
out?...He was
already taking out a tooth

 

Wife: "Why don't you ever callout my name when we're making love?" ! Husband: "Because I don't want to wake you."

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What dog rides a horse named Macaroni? Yankee poodle!

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What do you call an egg from outer space? An unidentified flying omelet!

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Q: What do little trees say on Halloween? A: Twig or treat.

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Delmer: How'd you like the play last night over at the high school? Parley: I only seed the first act, but not the second. Delmer: Why didn't you stay? Parley: I couldn't wait that long. It said on the program, 'Two Years Later.'

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How do you make rude noises on the Internet? With a whoop e-cushion.

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Knock Knock Who's there ! Artichoke ! Artichoke who ! Artichoke when he swallowed his yo-yo !

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Q: What is the difference between a banjo and a chain saw? A: A chain saw has a dynamic range.

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A minister and lawyer were chatting at a party: "What do you do if you make a mistake on a case?" the minister asked. "Try to fix it if it's big; ignore it if it's insignificant," replied the lawyer. "What do you do?" lawyer asked. "Oh, more or less the same. Let me give you an example. The other day I meant to say 'the devil is the father of liars,' but instead I said 'the devil is the father of lawyers,' so I let it go," minister replied.

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When the airline Captain announced they were flying over Salt Lake City, Utah, a woman told the man sitting beside her, "I understand this is the home of the Mormon religion where husbands believe it's OK to have more than one wife." That's true," he replied, "as a matter of fact I happen to be a Mormon myself and have nine wives." "How disgusting,"she said,"you should be ashamed of yourself, such practices should be against the law and you ought to be hung." With a slight grin, he just said, "Yes, mam I am."

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Once there were two chinese gentlemen named Mr. Ho and Mr. Chen. They were neighbors but happened to be very competitive. One day Mr. Ho decided to start a shoe business, he named his store WE DO SHOE. now Mr. Chen decided he must compete with Mr. Ho, so he started a shoe business right next door to Mr. Ho's store and he named it SHOE DO WE.

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When do ghosts usually appear? Just before someone screams.

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He is so dumb, he thinks an agent is someone who keeps track of your age!

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Knock Knock Who's there ! Czech ! Czech who ? Czech before you open the door !

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This day holds a lot of meaning for me. It was on this day two years ago that I lost my dear wife and children. I'll never forget that game of cards...

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Little monster: Mom, I've finished. Can I leave the table? Mommy monster: Yes, I'll save it for your supper.

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Q: What is the difference between a trumpet soloist and King Kong? A: King Kong is more sensitive.

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Where do retired pigs go for warm weather? The tropigs!

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I went to a restaurant that serves -breakfast at any time.- So I ordered French Toast during the Renaissance.

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Who invented the telephone? The Phoenicians (phone-itions).

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