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Dentist jokes

Anyone know the six most frightening words in

the world ??? "The Dentist will see you now."

 

What is a baby elephant after he is five weeks old ? Six weeks old !

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Did you hear about the aristocratic horse? He was the last of his race!

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Why does the Philippines ban rectal thermometers? They cause too much brain damage.

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Why are glow worms good to carry in your bag ? They can lighten your load !

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Knock Knock Who's there ! Crock and Dial ! Crock and Dial who ? Crock and Dial Dundee !

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A man has six children and is very proud of his achievement. He is so proud of himself that he starts calling his wife "Mother of Six" in spite of her objections. One night they go to a party. The man decides that it's time to go home, and wants to find out if his wife is ready to leave as well. He shouts at the top of his voice, "Shall we go home, Mother of Six?" His wife, irritated by her husband's lack of discretion shouts back, "Anytime you're ready, Father of Four!"

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What is the difference between men and pigs? Pigs don't turn into men when they drink.

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What did the monster say to his psychiatrist? 'I feel abominable.'

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It has been said that the United States has the best congressmen money can buy.

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A policeman came upon a super-salesman about to jump from a bridge and yelled, "Wait, Fellow! Please don't do that !!!" The salesman said, "Why not ?" and proceeded to expound on his views on the shaky economy, declining family life and Clinton politics. Shortly thereafter, they both jumped.

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Yo mama so ugly she got beat up by her imaginary friends

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I just sent my first e-mail. Kongratulations!

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Did you hear about the race horse that was so late coming in? They had to pay the jockey overtime!

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One idiot said to the other, "You know, there are really only three kinds of people in the world: those who can count, and those who can't.

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You're a big Internet fan aren't you? Yes - it's becoming a habit!

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Knock Knock Who's there ! Arnold ! Arnold who ? Arnold friend of yours is a friend of mine !

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A man who thinks he's George Washington has been seeing a psychiatrist. He finishes up one session by telling him, "Tomorrow, we'll cross the Delaware and surprise them when they least expect it." As soon as he's gone, the psychiatrist picks up the phone and says, "King George, this is Benedict Arnold. I have the plans."

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There were three American pilots captured by Germans in WWII. The Germans thought up a way to make the pilots crack and tell what they knew. They made them stand at attention, turn their heads from side to side and say, "Tick - Tock" over and over. After about three hours, the first pilot cracked and started telling all he knew, signing everything they put in front of him. An hour later, the second pilot cracked and started confessing to things that he didn't even do. The third pilot was fighting hard not to crack. He was about half-way cracked. He was turning his head to one side only and saying, "Tick...Tick...Tick..." The German officer in charge went up to him and said, "You thinks you iss so schmart! But I'm telling you dot vee haf vays to make you TOCK!"

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Did you hear about the monster who had twelve arms and no legs? He was all fingers and thumbs.

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Yo mama house so small you have to go outside to change your mind.

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