advertisements

Doctor and nurse jokes

Doctor:
You seem to be in
excellent health. Your pulse is as regular as
clockwork.
Patient:
That's because you've got your hand on my watch!

 

Why was the horseman fired from his job of saddle testing? He was always standing up on the job!

Read more!

Who runs the 100 acre wood website? www.innie the pooh.

Read more!

advertisements
advertisements

Knock Knock Who's there ! Cynthia ! Cynthia who ? Cynthia you been away I missed you !

Read more!

Why don't women work as long and as hard as men in the office? They do it right first time.

Read more!

Why did the monster take a dead man for a drive in his car? Because he was a car-case.

Read more!

Fred: I met a really conceited actor the other day. Harry: Why do you say he's conceited? Fred: Well, every time there was a thunderclap during the storm, he went to the window and took a bow.

Read more!

Why are Vampires Democrats? They want Gore in 2000.

Read more!

What do you get when you cross a frog and a rabbit? A rabbit that says, "Ribbit."

Read more!

Q.Why is a dog scared of a fire? A.It doesn't want to become a hot dog.

Read more!

Why were the elephants thrown out of the swimming pool ? Because they couldn't hold their trunks up !

Read more!

What do you call an Arab dairy farmer? A milk sheik.

Read more!

Q: What's the difference between God and fighter pilots? A: God doesn't think he's a fighter pilot.

Read more!

Why do pigs have flat snouts? From running in to trees.

Read more!

Teacher: Can you count to 10? Fred: Yes, teacher-one, two, three, four, five, six, seven, eight, nine, ten. Teacher: Now go on from there. Fred: Jack, Queen, King.

Read more!

Why is the air so clean and healthy on Halloween? Because so many witches are sweeping the sky.

Read more!

Karen: Have you noticed that Daddy is getting taller ? Sharon: No, why ? Karen: His head is sticking through his hair.

Read more!

The world's most incredibly lazy man found a magic lamp. He rubbed it and a genie appeared and granted him three wishes. He wished for a horse, a sumo wrestler and a squirrel. "They're yours, but what are they for?" the genie asked. "I'm tired of walking everywhere--I want to just ride the horse. The sumo wrestler is so that I won't have to work to get on the horse." "But the squirrel?" asked the genie. "I need something to go 'click-click' to start the horse!!!"

Read more!

Bad timing for an excuse Teacher: Why were you late? Pupil: Sorry, teacher, I overslept. Teacher: It's three in the afternoon!

Read more!

A fresh-faced lad on the eve of his wedding night asks his mother, "Mom, why are wedding dresses white?" The mother looks at her son and replies, "Son, this shows the town that your bride is pure." The son thanks his mom, and then seeks his father opinion, "Dad, why are wedding dresses white?" The father looks at his son in surprise and says, "Son, all household appliances come in white."

Read more!

What did the hungry Dalmatian say when he had a meal ? That hit the spots !

Read more!