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Elephant jokes

How
do you get an elephant into a
matchbox ?
Take all the matches out first !

 

How do you communicate with a fish? You drop it a line!

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Q: What did one strawberry say to the other? A:"Look at the jam you've gotten us into!"

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What do you call a ghost with a broken leg? Hoblin Goblin.

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What duo were famous for stealing horses? Bonnie and Clydesdale!

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Why is an egg like a young horse? Because it can't be used until it's broken!

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During a break on a North Dakota office building project, one of the construction workers approached Pyle. "Ah heard the boys is gonna strike," he said. "What fer?" asked Pyle. "Shorter hours." "Good fer them!" said the redneck. "Ah always did think sixty minutes was too long fer an hour!"

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Why did the Aggie call 911 in the car wash? - He thought he saw the rotating car washer as a tornado

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The teacher was furious with her son. "Just because you've been put in my class, there's no need to think you can take liberties. You're a pig." The boy said nothing. "Well! Do you know what a pig is?" "Yes, Mom," said the boy. "The offspring of a swine."

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Q: What were the three toughest years in Al Gore's life? A: Grade six.

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Mummy! Mummy! Have you seen my Cabbage Patch Doll? Be quiet and finish your coleslaw!

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What is the first thing ghosts do when they get into a car? They fasten their sheet (seat) belts.

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What's a bees favourite flower ? A bee-gonias !

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Doctor, doctor, I feel like I'm part of the Internet! Well, you do look a site

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Knock Knock Who's there ! Adeline ! Adeline who ? Adeline extra to the letter !

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1st man: "My neighbors were screaming and yelling at three o'clock this morning!" 2nd man: "Did they wake you?" 1st man: "Nah....I was up playing my bagpipes."

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"Now as I understand it, Sir," said the police officer to the motorist, "you were driving this vehicle when the accident occurred. Can you tell me what happened?" "I'm afraid not, officer," replied the motorist. "I had my eyes shut!"

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Teacher : Can't you retain anything in your head overnight ? Pupil : Of course, I've had this cold in my head for two days !

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What happens if you cross a parrot with a Gorilla? Nobody is sure, but if it opened its mouth to speak, you'd listen!

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What's black and white and turns cartwheels? A piebald horse pulling a cart!

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Pride is what you feel when your kids net $143 from a garage sale. Panic is what you feel when you realize your car is missing.

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