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Snowman jokes

What do snowmen eat for lunch ?
Icebergers
!

 

Customer: Give me a hot dog. Waiter: With pleasure. Customer: No, with mustard.

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CUSTOMER: How do you make a pig float? WAITER: Just give him an inner tube.

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Why aren't football stadiums built in outer space? Because there is no atmosphere!

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1st Witch: What's your new boyfriend like ? 2nd Witch: He's mean, nasty, ugly, smelly and totally evil - but he has some bad points too !

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Yo mama so fat she eats Wheat Thicks.

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If athletes get athlete's foot, then what do astronauts get? Missile toe.

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Do you know how to catch a squirrel? Climb a tree and act like a nut!

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How can you tell when a skunk is angry? It raises a stink!

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What stories are told by basketball players ? Tall stories !

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How can you tell if a bee is on the phone? You get a buzzy signal.

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Q: How many Cancerians does it take to change a lightbulb? A: None: A Cancerian would worry herself to death with the problem.

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Yo mama so fat people jog around her for exercise

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What is a vampire's favorite sport? Batminton.

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What do you give a deer with an upset stomach? Elkaseltzer.

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Yo mama so fat the highway patrol made her wear "Caution! Wide Turn"

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Fred got home from his Sunday round of golf later than normal and very tired. "Bad day at the course?" his wife asked. "Everything was going fine," he said. "Then Harry had a heart attack and died on the 10th tee." "Oh, that's awful!" "You're not kidding. For the whole back nine it was hit the ball, drag Harry, hit the ball, drag Harry."

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Willie: "I have an awful toothache." Tommie: "I'd have it taken out if it was mine." Willie: "Yes, if it was yours, I would, too."

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How do vampires keep their breath smelling nice? They use extractor fangs.

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Why type of lightning likes to play sports? -Ball lightning

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What do you get if you cross a tiger with a kangeroo ? A stripey jumper !

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