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Snowman jokes

What do snowmen eat for lunch ?
Icebergers
!

 

Why do bears have fur coats ? Because they'd look stupid in anoraks !

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Where do you find a down-and-out octopus ? On squid row !

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Yo momma so bald head she put a weave cap on and it weave her cull

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St. Peter and Satan were having an argument one day about baseball. Satan proposed a game to be played on neutral grounds between a select team from the heavenly host and his own hand-picked boys. "Very well," said the gatekeeper of Heaven. "But you realize, I hope, that we've got all the good players and the best coaches." "I know, and that's all right," Satan answered unperturbed. "We've got all the umpires."

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How did the telephones get married ? In a double ring ceremony !

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What do you call a telephone call from one vicar to another ? A parson to parson call !

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A group of Texas A&M Aggies and a group of Harvard students had been deadlocked in a spelling bee for an entire week. At the end of the contest the score was tied and the judges had a dilemma. They told the contestants that each group was to quickly come up with a poem using the word 'Timbuktu.' Well the Aggiess started laughing the minute the word was uttered but Harvard just smiled and prepared their short rhyme. One Harvard student stood up and for his group recited 'Through the desert all night we ride on camels walking two by two, Destination Timbuktu.' Well the crowd politely applauded - they knew the Aggies couldnt beat that and the Aggies just continued laughing throughout the whole process. One Aggie stopped giggling long enough to stand and read the team's effort. He said, 'Tim and I, a hunting went, we came upon three women in a tent. Since they were three and we were two, I buk one and Timbuktu!'

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What do you get if you cross teeth with candy ? Dental floss !

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Waiter, there is a bee in my alphabet soup ! Yes sir, and I'm sure there is an A, C and all the other letters too !

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yo mama so fat that when she puts on her yellow rain coat and walks down the street people shout out cab!

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Who invented the telephone? The Phoenicians (phone-itions).

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What do you call a vampire junkie? Count Drugula.

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What is black and white and black and white and black and white? A Newcastle fan rolling down a hill!

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The seven dwarves are down in the mines when there is a cave-in. Snow White runs to the entrance and yells down to them. In the distance a voice shouts out "Charlton are good enough to win the European Cup." Snow White says "Well at least Dopey's alive!"

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Yo mama so short she can play handball on the curb.

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What is the bank manager's favourite type of football? Fiver side!

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A woman is a person who, if she says to a man, "Never mind, I'll do it myself," and he lets her, and she gets mad, and he says, "Now what are you mad about?" says, "If you don't know I'm not going to tell you."

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Q: How many Taureans does it take to change a lightbulb? A: One, but just *try* to convince them that the burnt out bulb is useless and should be thrown away.

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How do snowmen read their e-mails? With an icy-stare!

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On her annual visit to another planet, an old lady turns to the cabin steward and says. "I hope this spaceship doesn't travel faster than sound. "Why?" replies the cabin steward. "Because my friend and I want to talk, that's why."

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