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Sport jokes

Which England player keeps up the fuel supply
?
Paul gas coin !

 

The Zen Master is visiting New York City from Tibet. He goes up to a hot dog vendor and says, "Make me one with everything." The hot dog vendor fixes a hot dog and hands it to the Zen Master, who pays with a $20 bill. The vendor puts the bill in the cash box and closes it. "Where's my change?" asks the Zen Master. The vendor responds, "Change must come from within."

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Yo mama middle name is Rambo.

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Why did the Irishman buy two tickets to the zoo? One to get in and one to get out.

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Patron: Waiter, why is there a spider in my glass? Waiter: It scares away the flies.

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What did the primary rainbow say to the secondary rainbow? -Your pants are on backwards

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Yo mama so fat when she lies on the beach no one else gets sun!

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What is a hurricane's favorite pet? -Anywhere from 1 to 5 cats

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Q: How many Leos does it take to change a lightbulb? A: None: Leos are so enthusiastic they carry their own light.

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Why did the weather want privacy? -It was changing

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What tea do footballers drink ? Penaltea !

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What do you get if you cross a phone with a rooster? A wake-up call!

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What happened to the man who tried to cross a lioin with a goat ? He had to get a new goat !

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First Caribou: Which bug does amazing motor cycle stunts? Second Caribou: Evel Boll Weevil.

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Why did a footballer take a piece of rope onto the pitch ? He was the skipper !

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How can you tell if a bee is on the phone? You get a buzzy signal.

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If they made a movie starring the Loch Ness monster and the great white shark from Jaws, what would the movie be called? Loch Jaws.

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Q: How many Sagittarians does it take to change a lightbulb? A: Look, ask me when I get back from India, okay?

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Q: How many 'Real Women' does it take to change a light bulb? A: None: A 'Real Woman' would have plenty of Real Men around to do it.

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Yo momma so fat she jumped in the air and got stuck.

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"I gotta 'A' in spelling," Tony told his father. "You dope!" he replied. "There isn't any 'A' in 'spelling'!"

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