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Sport jokes

Which England player keeps up the fuel supply
?
Paul gas coin !

 

Customer: Give me a hot dog. Waiter: With pleasure. Customer: No, with mustard.

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CUSTOMER: How do you make a pig float? WAITER: Just give him an inner tube.

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1st Witch: What's your new boyfriend like ? 2nd Witch: He's mean, nasty, ugly, smelly and totally evil - but he has some bad points too !

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Yo mama so fat she eats Wheat Thicks.

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Do you know how to catch a squirrel? Climb a tree and act like a nut!

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How can you tell when a skunk is angry? It raises a stink!

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What stories are told by basketball players ? Tall stories !

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How can you tell if a bee is on the phone? You get a buzzy signal.

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Q: How many Cancerians does it take to change a lightbulb? A: None: A Cancerian would worry herself to death with the problem.

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Yo mama so fat people jog around her for exercise

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What is a vampire's favorite sport? Batminton.

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What do you give a deer with an upset stomach? Elkaseltzer.

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Yo mama so fat the highway patrol made her wear "Caution! Wide Turn"

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Willie: "I have an awful toothache." Tommie: "I'd have it taken out if it was mine." Willie: "Yes, if it was yours, I would, too."

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How do vampires keep their breath smelling nice? They use extractor fangs.

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Why type of lightning likes to play sports? -Ball lightning

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What do you get if you cross a tiger with a kangeroo ? A stripey jumper !

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Diner: Why are the waiters in here so nasty? Waiter: Look at who they have to serve.

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What is the most popular game played by tornadoes? -Catch my drift

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What ten letter word starts with g-a-s? Automobile.

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