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Waiter jokes

Customer: This fish
isn't as good as what
I ordered here last month.
Waiter: That's funny. It's from the
same fish.

 

What do you call a witch with one leg? Eileen.

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Waiter, there is a bee in my alphabet soup ! Yes sir, and I'm sure there is an A, C and all the other letters too !

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A woman is a person who, if she says to a man, "Never mind, I'll do it myself," and he lets her, and she gets mad, and he says, "Now what are you mad about?" says, "If you don't know I'm not going to tell you."

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What's the favorite subject of young witches at school? Spelling.

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A city boy was on his first camping trip. He was eating his lunch under a tree when an old-timer came along. 'It smells like rain,' he said to the boy. The city boy replied, 'They said it was lemonade.'

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Yo mama cross-eyed and watches TV in stereo.

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Waiter, there is a fly in my wine ! Well you did ask for something with a little body in it!

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"Gosh, it's raining cats and dogs," said Fred looking out of the kitchen window. "I know," said his mother. "I've just stepped in a poodle!"

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Yo mama so fat when she has wants someone to shake her hand, she has to give directions!

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Yo mama so fat people jog around her for exercise

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Why did the woman take a load of hay to bed? To feed her nightmare.

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Yo mama so fat when she steps on a scale, it read "one at a time, please"

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Zoo visitor: What's the new baby hippo's name? Hippopotamus keeper: I don't know, he won't tell me.

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Waiter (serving soup): It looks like rain today. Patron: Yes it does, but it smells like soup.

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Is it good to drink witch's brew? Yes, it's very newt tricious!

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Yo mama so ugly that your father takes her to work with him so that he doesn't have to kiss her goodbye.

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What person adds best in hot weather? A summer.

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What is hail ? Hard boiled rain !

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Yo mama so skinny she hula hoops with a cheerio

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Yo mama so skinny she turned sideways and dissapeared.

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