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Waiter jokes

Customer: This fish
isn't as good as what
I ordered here last month.
Waiter: That's funny. It's from the
same fish.

 

Yo Mama's so fat that while she's sits on the beach, the lifeguard comes up to her to say, "Excuse me mame, but the tide wants to come in."

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CUSTOMER: How do you make a pig float? WAITER: Just give him an inner tube.

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Yo Mamas teeth are so yellow I can't believe it's not butter.

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YOUR MOMS HOUSE IS SO POOR I WENT TO KNOCK ON HER DOOR AND A ROACH TRIPPED ME AND A RAT TOOK MY WALET

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How does a witch make scrambled eggs ? She holds the pan and gets two friends to make the stove shake with fright ! 'Owl be seeing you later.'

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A young man called his mother and announced excitedly that he had just met the woman of his dreams. "Now what should I do?" His mother has an idea. "Why don't you send her flowers, and on the card invite her to your apartment for a home cooked meal?" He thought this was a great strategy, and a week later the woman came to dinner. His mother called the next day to see how things had gone. " I was humiliated," he groaned. "She insisted on washing the dishes." " What's wrong with that?" asked his mother. " We hadn't started eating yet."

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Q: How many Librans does it take to change a lightbulb? A: Well gee, I don't know really. I guess it depends on the bulb and where it burned out. It might perhaps take just one if it's just an ordinary bulb, but maybe two if the person doesn't know where to find a new light bulb, or perhaps ...

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Yo Momma so black when she goes swimming poeple thinks shes and oil spill.

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Q: How many Leos does it take to change a lightbulb? A: None: A Leo would order somebody else to change it.

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Yo mamma is so fat, her husband has to stand up in bed each morning to see if it's daylight.

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I took my son to the zoo yesterday. Really, did they accept him?

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What does a witch do if her broom is stolen ? She calls the flying squad !

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What does a witch enjoy cooking most? Gnomelettes.

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OUESTION: What is cosmetics? ANSWER: Cosmetics is a woman's means for keeping a man from reading between the lines.

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Yo mama's so fat when she takes a bath she fills the tub then turns on the water.

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Your momma is so fat that her measurements are 26-34-28, and her other arm is just as big!

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How can you make a witch itch? Take away her "W."

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yo mama so nasty... cows with mad cow disease run from her..

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Yo Mama so fat she gives herself group hugs!

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What did the hurricane say to the palm tree? -Hang onto your leaves, this will be no ordinary breeze

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