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Waiter jokes

Waiter: I'm sorry
I spilled a glass of
water on you.
Diner: That's all right. My suit is too large anyway.

 

yo mommas so poor the roaches pay the light bill!

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Q. What did the fog say to the light rain after her vacation? A. I mist you.

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Yo mama's so stupid, she ordered a cheeseburger without the cheese.

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Q) How do you spot a happy motorcyclist in fair weather? A) He's got bugs on his teeth.

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There is a Shreveport cable TV channel that broadcasts the (live) video of the Shreveport radar and the audio of the NOAA weather radio station. When explaining why he knew he should go into meteorology, he said that when he was young, he would sometimes watch the channel even when there were no echoes, just for fun.

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Yo mama's so fat, when she goes to Taco Bell, they run for the border !!

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Waiter, what is this cockroach doing on my ice cream sundae ? Skiing sir !

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Yo mama's so fat, when she turns around they throw her a welcome back party.

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yo mama so fat she sat on a tractor and made it a pick-up truck.

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How does a witch make scrambled eggs ? She holds the pan and gets two friends to make the stove shake with fright ! 'Owl be seeing you later.'

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What does a witch do if her broom is stolen ? She calls the flying squad !

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A Scotsman paying his first visit to a zoo stopped by one of the cages "An' whut animal would that be ?" he asked the keeper. "Thats a moose from Canada", came the reply. "A moose !!", exclaimed the Scotsman. "Hoots, mon, if that's a moose then they must ha' rats the size of elephants over there !"

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Yo mama so tall she tripped over a rock and hit her head on the moon.

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What happened to the naughty little witch at school? She was ex-spelled.

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Witch l: "How do you manage to stay in shape?" Witch 2: "I get a lot of hexercise."

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Women are like guns, keep one around long enough and you're going to want to shoot it.

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Yo mama so fat when she goes to an amusement park, people try to ride HER!

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"Waiter!" shouted the furious diner, "How dare you serve me this! There's a damn TWIG in my soup!" "My apologies," said the waiter. "I'll inform the branch manager."

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What happens when the fog lifts in California? UCLA.

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In the beginning, God created the earth and rested. Then God created Man and rested. Then God created Woman. - Since then, neither God nor Man has rested.

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